Ashens and the Polybius Heist

Tue May 11 '21 Announcement
almost 5 years ago – Tue, May 11, 2021 at 06:10:09 AM

Clicking on this very text will let you download the DIY VHS kit. Just get a standard VHS case (the smaller clear ones, not the big lumpy black ones like they had in rental shops), print off the art and away you go. It will look like this:

Fri Feb 19 '21 Announcement
about 5 years ago – Fri, Feb 19, 2021 at 06:33:51 PM

Hello!

There's a load of updates today so let's leap on them quicker than scalpers on Playstation 5 listings...

Thanking you
Y'know, I looked at Rotten Tomatoes again the other day where we still sit at 100% and... wow. I know I keep saying it but we all really mean it - thank you so much for believing in the film enough to give us half the money to actually make the bloody thing. We absolutely, literally couldn't have done it without you.

Shooting Script PDF
We reckon we've got enough distance on the release to stop this spoiling things for everyone, so away we go! Rather than attempt to force a download through Backerkit's many systems you can simply download it directly by clicking on this very text. You can now play the exciting game of "Spot The Ad-Libs"!

Polybius Blu-rays and DVD's
All of these were sent out weeks ago by the fulfilment centre. Fret not if yours hasn't arrived - they may not have reached the farther corners of the globe as yet. I'm going to set up a special e-mail address for dealing with any lost or damaged discs and will give it out in an update next week. If you have any urgent horror that needs dealing with before then, leave a comment here (rather than an Indiegogo message as frankly they seem not to work).

Other Perky Stuff
Other perks such as outstanding GameChild discs, Grab Bags and Sofa Slices are in the works. In a surprising move, it’s not possible to mark individual items as sent on Backerkit because of insane technical nonsense, so keep an eye on these updates to know what's being sent when. The only thing we can't work on currently is the premiere screening for obvious reasons - we'll be in touch on that when things get back closer to normal.

And now: SECRET THINGS
Next week the Ashens YouTube channel will turn 15 years old. Blimey, and possibly even crikey. Amazing to think that it started the same year that the Daniel Craig Casino Royale film came out and Hannah Montana debuted on TV. This feels like a milestone worth celebrating, so I’ll be putting up a whole bunch of jolly videos next week to mark the occasion.

As part of it we’ll also be putting the discs on general sale for a limited time, giving access to the non-backer part of humanity. It’s a limited sale - not in the sense of companies like Nintendo who create artificial scarcity of mass-produced items, but in the sense of having orders open for a short time so we don’t purchase vastly too little or too much stock leaving us financially ruined.

The hope, to level with you, is that this may get us close enough to breaking even on the budget that we could start to think about the possibility of a third film and of completing the trilogy. So tell your friends! Tell your enemies! Tell me! Except not the last one as I already know about it!

As well as Polybius and GameChild, we’ve also come up with a brand new making-of documentary that we’ll be selling as a separate disc, alongside some extra features and deleted scenes that we couldn’t fit on the Polybius movie disc. This was a bit of a gamble to be honest. It’s taken months of work to put together and we’ve taken a financial risk in making it, but we felt like there was a compelling story to tell and that it should be a good watch for those interested in the reality of what it’s like to shoot a feature on an ultra-low budget. Or for those who just want to laugh at how upset we look when things go wrong, of course.

Finally, we’ve now got 3 discs available and it’s a special occasion, so we put them together in a special ‘Ashens Collectors Edition’ which comes in a slipcase. This is priced relatively high so as to be able to afford to do some insane-headache-inducing-flattening-cardboard-boxes-shipping-jiggery-pokery to get it signed by the key creators in the midst of a pandemic. For this reason we can’t make many of them, but it’s a nice thing.

As these are relatively limited in supply, it’s only right you guys get first dibs. So if you’re interested in either of these new things we are giving you special preview access to the shop with a 20% discount on them until midnight on Sunday, before it goes live to everyone. Just head to: www.ashensmovie.com and use the password: “hello”. 

The pre-sale is meant just for you so please don’t share this around, the margins on the discounted stuff are pretty much zero. (But fair enough: You guys have already more than done your bit to support!) Also: If you already own GameChild and Polybius there’s also an option to get Fly on the Wall with the Collector’s Edition slipcase added at cost, so you can complete the set without buying anything twice.

One more thing
Speaking of extra-extra gubbins, I've got a couple of bonus unannounced digital freebies that I'll be sending out in an update next week. Including printable art for those of you who want Polybius Heist VHS cases. YES.

Anyway, I'm calling this to a close before it gets longer than the waiting list for the Playstation 5. Thanks for all your support over the years, it truly means the world. Here’s to the next 15 years...

Cheers,

Stuart.

Tue Jan 12 '21 Announcement
about 5 years ago – Tue, Jan 12, 2021 at 01:32:16 PM

Hello!

882 of you completed the poll and the results are:

That's a pretty hefty landslide for the cards being inserted and everything being sent out next week. So it is written, so it shall be.

Special shout-out to the 8 of you who somehow managed to skip the poll despite that not being an option. We salute you.

So! If you've got a disc as part of your pledge, PLEASE ensure you've completed the Backerkit survey and checked your address. Addresses will be locked on Thursday so if you're moving in the next 2 weeks change things now. And... if you haven't completed a survey then we'll be sending them to the addresses on Indiegogo, and we cannot guarantee any changes made there in the last 18 months went through. Even if it looks like they did your end. (It's not good, hence why we're trusting Backerkit first!)

Right, I'm off to sign lots of little cards.

Cheers,

Stuart.

Mon Jan 11 '21 Announcement
about 5 years ago – Mon, Jan 11, 2021 at 11:44:38 AM

Hello!

I come to you today with an IMPORTANT CHOICE.

As you know, the Polybius Heist discs are currently in a fulfilment centre waiting for me to travel there and sign them. Due to the currently appalling COVID-19 status in the UK (which is getting worse as I type - please be careful!) we spent last week working out how I could make the journey safely and perform the signing in accordance with the law. As ever, things kept changing, and the upshot is: I can't until the current lockdown is over. And we don't know when that will be - It currently looks like March at the earliest. Which, obviously, is rubbish and probably needs to be worked round.

As it's both logistically and financially unfeasible to have thousands of discs sent to my house and back, we've come up with two potential plans which I would like you all to pick from. We'll then go with the most popular option. 

PLAN A: ZERG RUSH
I sign thousands of specially-made business cards which are then included with the discs, rather than signing the cases themselves. Timescale: I can get these signed and out to the fulfilment centre by the end of the week. The discs (+ badges & coin) can then be sent out next week. 

Watch the video below if you'd like to see what the cards look like - I had them printed last week in case of a situation like this one.

PLAN B: TURTLE DEFENCE
The simple plan - We wait until I can travel and sign the disc cases directly. Timescale: Unknown, at least 2 months. 

I've set up a poll so you can let me know what you think. Personally I lean towards Plan A because waiting 2+ months will likely mean that a general audience will be able to buy and receive discs before you guys, which would hurt my soul. (Plus if you really want the case signed I can do that at Tatfest, whenever we can actually hold it...)

The poll is here: https://www.surveylegend.com/s/2x9s

And if you'd like to see exactly what the discs and everything look like, have a gander at this video:

PLEASE NOTE: This is a vote to see which option we go with for everyone. You are not picking which option only applies to you - that's not logistically possible. 

So! Please select an option in the poll, and I'll check back in 24 hours and see how it's going.

Cheers,

Stuart.

Sun Dec 20 '20 Announcement
over 5 years ago – Sun, Dec 20, 2020 at 10:06:17 AM

Hello!

Well, we've had a heck of a month. The film's out there and as far as we can tell from our various systems the vast majority of you have seen it. We really hope you enjoyed it. Feedback from all quarters has been beyond our wildest hopes - we're sitting at 100% on Rotten Tomatoes and you can't ask for much more than that!

Annoyingly we've not been able to get the discs out in time for Christmas. It came right down to the wire but we just couldn't get them in the postal system quickly enough - they're currently sitting in a warehouse at a fulfilment centre and will be sent out in early January. This is a bit of a kick in the pants for all of us, as not only would it have been great to have the discs in people's hands for Christmas but postal prices in the UK are increasing on January 1st so it'll cost us more to send them out... Bah. (But not humbug.)

Fortunately you can download your digital copy and force your elderly parents to watch it on Christmas day, which is the main thing. In the unlikely event you're having problems with your digital copy here's a quick FAQ based on what we've learned:

Q: I filled in my survey but never got an e-mail with the Vimeo code. What should I do? Consult the local pie-man?
A: Firstly check your spam folder just in case. Then your best bet is to create a Backerkit account if you haven't already - you can then find your codes listed after you log in. Do not attempt to contact any pie-men, local or otherwise.

Q: When I enter the code it tells me that my code is verified, however when I click confirm I just get a message saying "Oops! That wasn't supposed to happen. Please try again in a few minutes." Can the local pie-man help?
A: This is actually a problem with your web browser. We have no idea what causes it, but if you try another browser it'll work. DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES APPROACH THE PIE-MAN.

Q: The local pie-man is standing outside my front door but does not knock. What does he want?
A: This matter is unrelated to Vimeo codes and we cannot offer advice.

Also! PLEASE, PLEASE MAKE SURE YOUR ADDRESS IS CORRECT IN BACKERKIT if you're getting a physical item. Update it if you've moved since completing the survey, and if you haven't filled in your survey please do so. I'll be travelling to the warehouse with a big box of badges and coins very early in the new year to sign all the discs, and they'll be sent out immediately after so there won't be time for address-faff.

I'll be back in touch early next year. Until then, please enjoy this video of two incredibly talented Polybius cast members duelling each other with their voices:

Once again, thank you all so much for your support. All of us on Team Polybius wish you a Merry Christmas to you all (such as it is this year) and here's to a much better 2021!

Cheers,

Stuart.